dear Mike,

this has been the hardest decision of my life. i've been thinking hard about it ever since when i started to feel like our relationship stagnates. i'd love to give everything i have for you and i would even love to give u the understanding that you definitely deserve. but i know deep in my heart how i tried so hard to be strong, i knw that ive been putting aside my frustrations and anxieties because i dont want to jeopardize our relationship and i dont want u to worry about me. i dont want u to know how scared i am because i dont want u to think anything else but ur training and urself. on ur part, i know how precious were the times that you always spend with me. Now that were over, I wanna remember the times when u were tired but still you go online because you dont want to upset me. Everything we had could've been perfect because I know we love each other so much. But i hope you understand that I happen to arrive at a point where I kept on asking myself, "how bout me?" It hurts me so much because I don't want to leave you because if i have the choice, I'd stay with you all the way; but im thinking about myself too. I can't be depress all the time in my life, i can't be anxious all the time, i can't be scared always in thinking about us. It hurts me when were together because I know im gunna be holding on to something that is unsure but it hurts me more now that i realized you might have to think that just like the others, i left you. I wanna prove to you that I am staying with you but it takes alot of strength and I don't have that anymore... I hope that in time we'll meet again; another time and a little more perfect place. u take care and i love you