how to see the light in the dark

how to see the light in the dark remains to be a mystery to me. i feel like, its something really impossible. now that i got mike back and promised God of some stuff, now im back on my knees again. i've reached the red bar again and im running out of strength. i'd like to to think that my heart is stronger but each passing minute sends bullet into my chest. i felt like i died a thousand times. my mind says i have to be thankful that he'd given me the chance, but my heart questioned this chance. my mind says its okay coz i tried, but my heart is stabbed a million times. my mind says to move on but my heart weeps and dont want to beat again. my mind says to focus on my family and friends but my heart searched for him. tell me god pls if its a NO. give me a sign..

my own movie review of 3 Idiots- but not really!

Back in college, writing is a task. You have to scribble down words and make sense out of them because you are obliged to do so. Im happy it ended. But now, I feel like writing about this movie I watched with my friends.

Well, first off, it was a good decision to not go with my high school friends in an overnight swimming because if i did, I would have pass the chance to be with my family and enjoy my sister's recognition day. We decided to have a simple family get together in Naga Park. We brought table and chairs and we just sit, laugh, eat under the night sky and enjoy this very precious family moment. This is one simple pleasure in life that I really appreciate--looking out into an endless sea with the sparkling reflection of the myriad stars in the night as if they have fallen from the sky but they just couldn't stop shining even in the waters. I on the other hand, fell asleep. It felt good, sleeping outside, feeling the night breeze kissing my skin yet you get the feeling that you are safe.

Im glad my sister disrupted me. I hate interruptions but this is one of the few instances when I didn't mind at all. She decided to go out with her friends and I decided (for the last minute) to catch up with the Carebears :)

Lee's spaghetti is really good! We spent the night at Jillan's place (Jrams boyf) while he was away for Bantayan Island. Of course, we fill the night with laughter and just goofing around like mad girls. Lee and her daughter decided to go up and call it a day while Des, Jrams and I stayed awake. Jrams had fallen asleep (i'd like to think so) while Des and I were both fighting the need to sleep because we're eager to watch 3 Idiots.

I watch movies to kill the time; to ease boredom. I recall my brothers downloading this movie at home but I could care less. I, at the back of my mind wanted to watch it, but so as just to kill the time when boredom strikes. I watched an Indian Movie before. I concluded, it was a good one but realized how the poverty in India causes me nothing but sadness about something that I can't do anything about. There's this one Indian guy at work. I admire his wit and humor. I remember him saying something about the Slumdog Millionaire movie (which was a blockbuster hit) and how it unfairly depicted India in the world. He said, India is not like that at all; he never liked the movie. Well, I should agree with him because he at the end is an Indian himself and I wouldn't bother wasting my time defending why he should like the movie. It provokes a thought inside my head that, like Philippines, India has two faces and it is not right to see her as something filthy. In fact, they are rich in culture and they are peopled with such great talents.

A movie. It's a story; mostly fiction. It entertains. A mediocre movie helps you kill the time. But the best movie will not only kill your time but also would have the ability to bring your soul to a place where you've never been before but will still manage to touch your heart because your heart feels the familiarity; the connection. It should have the ability to transcend you from your current state and bring you somewhere else.

3 Idiots is one of the few movies that moved me. I am awed at how the movie was perfectly weaved with such a gentle clarity, cunning yet humorous script, great and breathtaking cinematography, not to mention the universal morals, the rich Indian culture and the smart ability to raise social consciousness. I am not a license critic but I'm sure is a movie watcher, and I find the movie perfect!

I noticed that the movie has dancing and singing; I barely see this component in American or Western movies. I enjoyed the sing-dance part of the movie because; first of all, they never happen in real life. It's very unrealistic and it brought me somewhere else new; it successfully helped me escaped reality. I sure appreciate how the movie managed to clash the world of Engineering and Medicine (the scene where the engineering students helped out Mona deliver her baby and the use of Engineering skills to do it). The clashing of the two worlds is insane but beautiful.

Though the characters and the movie itself picked engineering as the center of the theme, it does tells us more about the profession. I think it's not even about engineering at all. The movie is about you chasing your own personal dreams and living up with the people's expectations. It's no easy task; this simple fact does not happen in India only but i think this is something universal. This happens to rich kids belonging to affluent families and this also happens to average people from average families as this also happens to people who are in poverty. It happens to all of us. It is in short, how you live your life by perhaps meeting the demand of others, or how we choose to jump on the bandwagon, or if we're fearless enough to defy them and stand by our dreams-- with two feet standing tall and clenched hands with so much passion and conviction. It's about using your lifetime wisely by letting your loved ones know what is in your heart and how little we could afford regret to come in to our life. It is about believing in your self; coming out of your nutshell and saying to yourself that, "all is well".

Aside from this very humanistic dilemma, the movie also has created a perfect image of friendship. The very core of our living is friendship. It is a very powerful bond made out of love, trust, and commitment to stand by these people we are friends with. They are the push when we feel like going down, but they are also these people who we can be crazy with. You can be friends with your family, lover, and to people you share the same ideals with-- well actually anyone (except those of course, you don't want to associate with) because there's really no standard gauge on how to set this people up in your life and how well you can keep them.

I certainly love the picturesque side of India. It captivates me!

Aside from the fact that I cried more than once, I also can't count how many times the movie has made me laugh my heart out. It's witty and plainly humorous. I'm amazed as to how they transition a happy scene to a moving one and vice versa. It makes you laugh at one point and the next you're already crying!

How could one capture all of them in one movie; I wouldn't know. But, im lucky that this movie had reached me. For the first time, I didn't watch a movie to kill the time, or maybe it killed the time... but it was a nice kill :)