When i was in the jeepney earlier, i thought about mike and I— i thought about our relationship and how we should deal with it. It’s so hard when u miss someone so much and u ache for him but he can’ be there. Looking at everything between us, i know i have the choice to just walk out. If im goin to use my head and not my heart, I would pity myself and just walk away from it. There will be alot of reasons but I always tell myself that i love him and its all that matters. And it will lead me to forget about everything because my heart rules even when its painful. I understand that I cant blame him about this because it was our choice to stay. I can’t be too selfish in claiming that I’ve been waiting and hurting and had been depressed all along because I know he also had his part that only him could understand; that only he himself had only gone through. And i respect that. Even when it takes two to tango, the other can change the course of the dance and turn it into something “not-so-tango.” It is possible. But i cant seem to decide for myself right now. I need him. I miss him and it hurts so much L
