alone

mike and i have been lately fighting. it hurts me so much bec i feel like whatever i do; i can't bring him to be gentle on me. i feel like he didnt care what ive been through when he joined the military. ive been crying and ive been confuse, been botttling this all up by myself. i never showed that each day of waiting and hoping; that my heart brittles. i wanna hold on and be strong for our relationship but i end up feeling nothing but self pity. sometimes i just needed him to remind me to hold on just like before. he wants me to be strong but now when i cant take it anymore, he pushes me away