One More Chance

When it comes to movies, content is important for me. Questions like, "Is it realistic?" if it's not, "will it keep me entertained the whole time?" are the top things I would asked to make a movie good enough for me. Filipino movies are not the most enticing to watch on my "list" because they are not that realistic for me and sometimes they just don't keep me entertained at all. Or sometimes, I dont find any social relevance in them  compared to Indian movies that I watched in the past. When I watch, it should be transcending or if not, it should just be as realistic as one could be. One More Chance is by far my favorite Filipino movie. The story is simple but it in all aspects, its true and it can happen to anyone in real life. I like how a story can be so tragic. Hey its tragic but so is life. 

                                      That's a spoof pic my friends and I made when we we're bored in Davao.


I can watch the movie again and again. I commend John Lloyd and umm Bea Alonzo for a job well done. It tells us about how beautiful love is when they're shared by someone but at the same time, its the same love that can bring so much pain and misery on each and everyone. Goes to show that too much love is dangerous coz you're giving pieces of you to that person and he/she can break your heart and can spin your life upside down  ANYTIME, without you knowing when. It can give you a real hard blow. The movie captures everything and I love it.

One of my favorite scene was when the guy told the girl that he will be going away to Qatar for work. He mentioned about how he still loves the girl but he's the one who needs "time" this time. It's complicated but with the pain he's gone through, its totally understandable. The girl absolutely knows where he's coming from. They locked it with a good release of painful tears and a bittersweet kiss.

                                                                        my fave scene :(

When you love, leave a portion of yourself to yourself. Give each other  own personal space and time. Being together doesnt mean you need to do everything together. Plan your own trip, your own "me time" and make your own decisions. You can do all these and still come home to the person that you love. Strive to be better everyday for yourself and for your loved ones. But hey, nobody will be able to realize all of these without getting hurt. Like, what I said, its complicated. It is beautiful but sad. Love is profound and it has its own and unique definition to each and everyone of us. Here's one of  my favorite lines from Popoy. 

"I want my HEART to stop breaking, sana pag naging tayo na ulit, kaya na kitang mahalin ng buong buo. na walang halong takot kung masaktan man tayo ulit."

driver's license

           I am the most laid back person I ever met. Im not even sure if that's the right word. It's just that, I dont keep goals that much so I often end up wandering in the air. I think its something that I need to work on in the future. Well, I do have things I wanted to accomplish in life, I just needed to be more focus, I guess. 

           So, I remembered that early this year I had a few goals I wanna accomplish before this year will end. I guess I was keeping it at a very minimum number of 3 goals. I honestly cant remember the third one and most probably its the reason why by far (as early as now) I only get to see the two in progress ;p Anyhow, Im happy about it.

             My first goal is something I wanna talk about some other time, in another post. But the second one is about obtaining a driver's license! So lookie the title of the blog! 

           Now to start off, here's a pic of myself in the driver's seat.

                                                   I am now the girl behind the wheels!

            Oh well, for the life of my dad-- he believed that I can never drive a manual car so he bought an automatic and used car that I can use to and from work. It's a 2004 model of Nissan March. Well, who cares. I just needed wheels so I was kind of happy because that means, it will eventually put a stop to my seemingly endless agony of commuting every day. 

           But of course, I needed to get proper license in driving. I got one last month. 

  It's a student permit that I needed to get first

       I am impressed of how fast and orderly the LTO (Talisay) was when I acquired my student permit. It was very convenient and I went through a smooth process. I paid about P300 to get one. It's actually my second time in getting a student permit. It expires after a year but you can apply for a real license (Professional or Non Professional) after a month from the day you got the SP. So an SP looks like the one above. I must say that I hate the government photo IDS! Everything in their office is routine so they wont care much if you're prepared to get yourself a shot or not. So mine looks like a disaster, as always!

         I just got back from my trip in Palawan. Earlier today, I went to LTO to get my Non Prof license. I paid about a hundred pesos to start the process. I chose to follow the standard process in obtaining a license wherein one would need to pass the written exams before the practical test. Well to cut the chase, I didnt pass the written exams. Needed to get 30 out of 40 but I only got 29! I dont know if I will be frustrated. Well I guess I am. I needed to wait another month to reapply. So thats another friggin 30 days of not being allowed to drive alone! Oh well, I am too dormant to take any risk/ exams so failing the written exams made me sad today. The thing about it though is that I can retake the next month. Now my mini goal is to nail the exams and give them a whooping perfect score! hahaha

         Everything happens for a reason, maybe despite of my hours in practicing driving, maybe I needed another month to practice more before the practical exams. Hopefully next month I wont need any lucks to pass. I will ace it for sure ;p

           

driver

I'm a certified commuter. Riding jeepneys to and from everywhere around the city is a part of my daily life; its a part of my system so its not something big of a deal. But i will mention it anyway. Im gunna make it worth a topic for my blog.

Riding jeepneys are convenient to most cebuanos and at the same time, it saves you a whole lot of money. Do the math; 8 vs 60 pesos for a short distance trip if you'd go for the windy jeepney ride rather than hailing a taxi cab. It definitely has perks. When you are seated all the way inside, you get to feel how to be the "konduktor" as you obviously will be given the favorable task of handing the fare to the driver and vice versa.     One of the very common scenario would be the jam packed arrangement which you dont really have much of a choice but to comply and squeeze your whole body in because the driver insists of the "walo-walo" seating capacity. Oh boy, you wouldnt imagine how in the world you we're able to sit and fit in a very tiny space and yet you are able to reach your destination with all your body parts whole, intact and in place. Oh well... Those are the few things one can experience in riding a jeepney. I can write a book about it!

Well, on my way home earlier my jeepney ride was kind of interesting. As opposed to the typical jeepney driver, im a bit surprised because our destined driver at that time reminds me of a typical balik-bayan or ofw from "saudi" with all those thick silver jewelries hanging around his neck and wrist with a gigantic ring on his finger. I am definitely not belittling jeepney drivers but he is not the usual scene. Then a story automatically would create inside my head. Maybe perhaps he is a retired and loyal employee and has got nothing to do on a fine saturday night that's why he is out in the road making money out of his boredom. Maybe he was indeed a humble ofw, he gets to accomplished sending all his kids to school and now he is taking life slow and makes a little money out of driving jeepney. Did I mention he's got an ipod to play for his music? Well, I will never know... What I know is he kept me awake from the whole trip because he's given me things to think about. I just find the little things in life interesting. Well whatever that is, he brought me home safe so  I pray that God will continue to bless him. There's more i gotta share about my jeepney rides but I'll settle for a few things now coz im really tired.

Wait, what's with fake grapes hanging on jeepneys' dash boards??

he makes me happy

Though lovers be lost, love shall not. Dylan Thomas' line had' hit me. I seldom write about happy things and I'm writing one today. I feel i am loved, wanted and needed by Tony.
Taciturn. That's what he is. That's how I always known him to be. But there is so much in him and he makes me wonder all of the time. I dont know, I feel like what we have right now, is so precious and its something I dont wanna lose. He simply makes me happy and I he said the same thing to me. We can be happy and not think about the future. I can live with that...

evasion

I knew all the while it that was his choice to walk away from me. I was in deep denial by then, it was spiral. Endless spiral downward staircase of dark emptiness; an abyss I so greatly feared. And one day, (I forgot exactly when) I woke up and told myself that I have to stand on my own, that I should bury the thoughts of him and just simply move on. I did. There were lesser and lesser questions in my mind; why he didnt contact me, and what he's been doing, what his daily routine like, if I ever cross his mind. I'll keep my share of pain and hopefully will learn from all of  it.

I am moving on. Painfully, slowly but im moving on. I just hate the fact that even when I know im heading to that direction, he still holds something in me. I cant ignore the fact that he still has power over me. He still does because this "him-evasion" is still haunting me, it still gets to me. Every once in a while, in the middle of my reverie, his thoughts would permeate. And i cannot speak on his behalf. I dont know why he left without letting me know. I don't know why if it's because i am being too much on him.... i really dont know why. I just knew I deserve answers and it may be something I cannot find in one single lifetime.

Perhaps, in another lifetime?

I had an early morning walk to the sari-sari store today and I realized that it has been a long time since I bought something in a sari-sari store. Now that I could find pretty much everything at home and that a flight to the malls are much more convenient to me, I hardly go and buy something in that small and humble store. While ringing the bell for someone to get what I want, I studied the insides of the store. I can see the candies, the chips in small packets, the cheap chocolates.. etc.

But it of course brought me to a place in time when I frequently go and run to our old place's small sari-sari stores. Those that our neighbors had; I was a frequent buyer in two stores as far as I can remember. It was a fun moment back then when a single peso meant an ice candy, candies, Pirate, Goody Goody and much more that a peso could offer for a kid like me. The fun part was whenever my mom would ask us to run errands to the sari-sari store, any change meant a reward for my sister and I and we would indulge ourselves with the fun stuff that we could find in Manang Yoli's or Manang Pakit's store. It genuinely was a happy moment; when the things we wanted in life were simple and can be managed by only a few peso. It obviously changes as we grow up. Things will be a little complicated, harder and a peso reward for yourself is highly impossible at this time. And I understand that. We need more, we crave more and we hit the goals higher in life rather than goin on a trip to the sari-sari store to consume the change you saw at your house's nooks and corners. But i was wondering where it go, how it stopped, when it ended? ahhh.. nostalgia!

i was made lucky

Though sometimes loneliness gets to me, I still feel lucky despite of my own personal battles about love and life. I was hurt so bad, and maybe I'm still hurting right now but God still found His way to me by giving me alot of things to thanked about. I am somewhat proud of where I am right now. I have a job, I am single, I got no major responsibilities. I am living a carefree life. I sure do have payables but they do not require stress; or maybe I'm just being too lenient in life right now. In terms of my career, I still haven't stepped up yet because I still don't know what I really want. Im taking it slow and im carefully thinking about where to go from here. But even when sometimes it makes me sad knowing all of the others are stepping up, I still believe something is great coming in my way. Maybe not now, not here but there will come a time that I'll be in a happier place and position. I am positive.

I got me on my back. I have issues. I am a friend and enemy to myself. I may not be confident at all times but in tough times, I have myself to believed in. I know I can count on the girl staring at me in the mirror. God is my partner at all times. I seldom ask God for something but when I do, oh boy I tell you, I have an AWESOME God! He knows me too well and He knows that whenever I ask something, it is something that I badly wanted and he hears me. I proved it alot of times in my life. He gave me enough pain to be strong. He has given me less so that I'd stay grounded. I could write about every single thing God has bestowed me and I could use up all day. But I got no need to do that because my faith is all that matters. It is the unwritten, this unexplained gratitude that I feel towards life matters the most.

I can make the people I love laugh. It's in me. I often miss my bestfriend's laughing until it creates tears on her eyes. And i feel happy sharing the best times of life with her even when we're just at home hanging out. I miss her so much and her laughs stamped into my memory and as of right now I will hold on to them since she's far away. I dance the craziest when Im with my family and they go crazy laughing at my steps. They will then grab their cameras and fone to record my crazy dancing and it makes me want to dance more. They would then tell me that I have ADHD then we would laugh again. We love doing baby talks and I know its pathetic and crazy but hey, it's just the way it is when Im with them. I love it when I goof around and they would laugh. Its music to me. It goes the same thing for my closest friends. I feel like this ability to make people laugh is a gift from God. He knows how it means to me that I can somehow manage to make them smile and laugh :)

I may not have enough in life, I may be short with alot of things but just like everybody else, I was made lucky and I will try my best everyday to believe that I always am bound to be. Wherever life would take me, in the ocean of discouragements,  i'll rise above and stay afloat because i am.....just lucky ;p