weekend

I went to Kuya Jay's and Ate Ana's wedding last Saturday and boy it was the most meaningful wedding i've ever attended. It was simple yet the best. I could see them very much in love with each other and i guess that's all that matters. With a crazy weather, the wedding was held in a beautiful garden at Montebello and surprisingly the weather cooperated! It was a day God created for them. The food was awesome i went straight to cloud 9!!

After, we went clubbing to Vudu and enjoyed teqilla. I was wasted :D then went to K1 right after...

I had to get up early though for Talima...

Talima was fun! thats all!

im missing u and its killing me

When i was in the jeepney earlier, i thought about mike and I— i thought about our relationship and how we should deal with it. It’s so hard when u miss someone so much and u ache for him but he can’ be there. Looking at everything between us, i know i have the choice to just walk out. If im goin to use my head and not my heart, I would pity myself and just walk away from it. There will be alot of reasons but I always tell myself that i love him and its all that matters. And it will lead me to forget about everything because my heart rules even when its painful. I understand that I cant blame him about this because it was our choice to stay. I can’t be too selfish in claiming that I’ve been waiting and hurting and had been depressed all along because I know he also had his part that only him could understand; that only he himself had only gone through. And i respect that. Even when it takes two to tango, the other can change the course of the dance and turn it into something “not-so-tango.” It is possible. But i cant seem to decide for myself right now. I need him. I miss him and it hurts so much L

work work work

One week and one day at work is FUN. I get my company's drift. I do not have any idea how other bpo companies run their training because I only had an experience with one. My experience though was very far from the current one because we jumped right to client specifics and did not had time to tackle on voice and accent training or communication skills. I always believe that one can practice a skill if he has a better understanding on the matter itself. Because we're not native speakers of English, it is as equally as important not just to practice speaking the language but also, to have an idea why we have differences and difficulties in the second language. And it is by understanding these challenges that we are more conscious on which we could improve on and so that we can speak the language close to how natives speak. It made sense why we need to spend 2 weeks training for voice and accent. I love the class so much because it kind of reminds me of my college classes as well but it makes more sense to me right now because I get to use it for my line of job. The application is right there and I am looking forward to learn more and be fluent with the language.

I also like our trainer, Thirdy. Wow, special mention right there... I know im creepy right but here is his picture,

He looks like that but he speaks differently. By different, i mean to say that his voice doesnt match his face (on that certain picture). haha.. I like him so much because he knows just alot of things plus i cant forget how stern he was during my interview. I was lost with words because he literally was like writing just about everything I said on that day. It scared the hell out of me, and for the first time i was afraid for the longest time.

Anyway, i gotta roll now and i really need to sleep. runny nose kills me!

how'd u like my new page? :D

i woke up early today which is kind of ironic since i dont have work. everything is unusually dark but oh well...

i miss mike so much that it hurts :(

just being random

Im here in a very obscure internet cafe and for some reasons im experiencing the ultimate lag time of my life. I am typing without the letters appearing on the screen but it typed though. nah whatever...

im kind of a masochist today because im pounding the keyboard even when my finger hurts like crazy! i hurt it last night when i was rummaging through Hershey's "vanity basket"; i actually sliced my finger on to her "de-tangler comb". oh man it hurts like hell.

anyway, i'd had a few observations for today. hehe

RANDOM 1: I hate it when people inside the jeepney stares at me! I mean yes i'l give u the right to stare at me but please dont go over with my time limit! It annoys me real time. I mean why would u stare at someone? that is just so mean. but anyway, in reality i cant really do anything about it. What i can do though which i always do anyway is raise my eyebrow and just give them back a nasty look; they deserve it...

RANDOM 2: I always find myself PLAIN and simple yet i find it nice when a few people vocally tells me that they like me (or they like the way i look). I mean, of course they wont like my personality (haha) but i take pride too when they compliment me with my body and i think i should start believing in myself that im perhaps attractive! (im having a hard time convincing myself with that).

RANDOM3: I am terribly missing Mike!!! oh gosh, i dont even want to start writing about it. I'll write more later..

for now, im waiting for Bing because we gunna watch SEX and the CITY! wohoo!! i know people would flood the theater but goodluck though!


ciao!

umm amm...

First day of official training is over! It went well and i really liked the fact that they not only teach us proper pronunciation and all that voice and accent stuff but they made us understand the basics. Its a great help and I am really liking it so far though im all jittery and nervous about the whole thing. Im just being thankful that aside from my salary, i also get to learn things that are quite basic but they actually verbalized and organized everything we need to know why the heck we speak English differently. I know i should be positive about it and I guess im goin to learn ALOT about it which is im very excited about.

So, everything went well for today except for the fact that mike is not around. I terribly miss him.. like crazy!!! One thing i should learn about this is to keep up with my hope and above all, have faith in God. I realized that i should be partner with God in all times whether something is goin on my way or not. I felt so guilty for not honoring God especially last year. I know i've lost my path but i wanted to be with Him again. I know He will not let me down when everything else will...

I gotta go now! ciao!

new work life

I'd finish the 2 day induction thing with my new company. Everything was good and i know im very lucky to be one of the first 200 "bankers" hired in Cebu City. Its quite something to me though i dont act as if i give a damn. hehe. On monday would be training and Im kind of nervous again. I know i should enjoy every bit of it and learn from it but self doubt is eating in on me. I remember what my previous manager told us, that the only person who could put u down is YOU, yourself. Its easier said and done but its absolutely true. I just need to conquer my fears, believe in myself and let positive energy come in. wee!!

missing

everyday has been a miracle for me. its not easy living each day, living each hour, living each minute or second not knowing and not hearing from mike. And i know, he felt the same way too.. he might have feel twice the pain im undergoing right now. sometimes, life gets sour without any notices and it struck u along and u dont have a choice but be strong and sturdy as u can be. I wish i can reach mike tell him to hang in there, remind him i love him and to tell him his all what i am thinking of every day.. that i just, just love him. I wish i can hug him and tell him everything would be fine. i leave it all to God, trust mike that he can surpass training and most of all trust God whatever the outcome would be. now that i got a feeling that he's been having difficulties in training, i feel like i wanna be strong for him. oh god, if i can just break down and cry, drown all the miseries.. but i know that would be the last thing i wanna do. i wanna be there for him. i know he feels me right now. i love u so much baby

new job

im starting my new job today! im excited and i really dont know what to expect. good thing domz also got in with the same sched so its not that edgy knowing i have a friend coming along! goodluck to me! hehe.. i'll blog more later!